I cry each time I take the tree down. Well, not really. .

Congratulations!   You survived another Christmas Holiday Season.  Years ago I became aware of a stress test wherein you could determine how likely you are to get really sick in the near future as determined by the number of points you score.  The premise is that the higher the score, the more likely you are to experience physical illness or another stress related malady.  For example, if you had a significant financial blow or lost or started a job, or added a new member to the family, etc., etc. you were assigned a certain number of points.  Understandably there are huge things that give you a larger number of points such as trouble with the law, divorce, and of course, a death in the family.  But,  I was surprised to find that simply getting through the Christmas season was one of the ways you could add points.  Even good things can add some stress to our lives, such as a promotion at work or a vacation.  So how did you do?  Was it the joyous season you hoped it would be or are you simply glad it is over?  I always like to take a minute at the end of the season to consider what went well and what didn't go so well and whether the person I was trying to honor during the Holiday was pleased or disappointed in my efforts. 

Honoring the Season:  I believe that we should honor and celebrate religious holidays and special occasions.  The Savior honored these kinds of traditions.  His first recorded miracle was performed at a marriage in Cana.  But honoring the season can be difficult if it involves extreme and costly preparations.  I think we should avoid the goal as mothers to make the holiday amazing for all within our stewardship.   We need to remind ourselves, and our children, that it will be a great season if we individually take efforts to stay close to our Father in Heaven, both in the creation and implementation of our plans.  While some claim that the season brings great feelings of love and increased feelings of the spirit, others struggle to maintain the spirit they have the rest of the year, because they feel so burdened by the holidays.  I try to remember that it isn't the Lord who over-programs me, I do that to myself.

A week before Christmas I fell into my bed exhausted.  We had four December birthdays and a daughter who completed her mission with all the excitement and gatherings that accompany that happy event.  Our returned missionary also had surgery on her foot the day following her homecoming talk and lots of follow-up care. I did a self-check and couldn't recall feeling the spiritl that particular day or even the day before.  I wondered if I was failing and displeasing the Lord in my offerings.  I cracked open the scriptures, began reading with honest intent, and the spirit returned.  I had been reading the scriptures, but in my "busy-ness" that exercise had become perfunctory.  I felt increased hope knowing that if I involved the Lord more, simplified my preparations and got more rest, I would make it through the season.

Honoring Relationships:  At Christmas time many people find themselves experiencing some genuine depression.  Often it is because this is that time of year where we consider the strength of our relationships with significant others.  We may feel like a fifth wheel if we are unmarried or not currently "in a relationship".  We greatly miss those who have passed on.   There may be family members who are estranged.   Some who have departed from the predominant faith of their families may feel judged and "cast out".   Gathering with loved ones who don't seem to be going through what we are going through can often be a painful reminder of our circumstance.  Even deciding how to recognize neighbors and how many to acknowledge can be stressful.  If this is a time when we are struggling financially, the holidays may seem particularly bleak. 
 

A Time to  Focus and Refocus:  At these times, we need to focus first and foremost on our own relationship with Christ.  One of my favorite traditions is to gather on Christmas Eve, where the focus is less on gifting and more on the Savior.  We do have all the siblings exchange names which rotates each year, and they exchange their gifts that night.   Grandma gives a gift to all the grandchildren.  The little ones do the manger scene as Luke is read.  But then we have adult guests from that first Christmas, dressed in costume, who share their stories with us.  They especially focus on how they individually prepared to receive the Savior.  The point is often considered that these individuals had relationships with the Savior before this great event occurred.  I think it doubtful that Mary had not had spiritual experiences prior to this time.  She was surprised at the Angel Gabriel's salutation, not at seeing an angel.  It is ludicrous to me to think that Joseph's revelation to marry Mary was his first spiritual experience. I believe he had enough spiritual experience to know and trust in that message from the Lord.  Every time I see my family members dress up, I consider that the individuals who received him were mortals just like us.  We too can make the decision to please the Lord, instead of pleasing men.  They had hope in the fact that pleasing God would lead to a glorious future in His Kingdom.   Like these great individuals in the past, we must proclaim what we believe to be true, live by faith, not seeing the end from the beginning, and allow those who hear us the choice to consider our testimonies or not.  It is to reach out in faith, knowing we need the atonement every bit as much as any being who has ever lived, except for Him, who made that atonement possible.  This may a time when we are given the opportunity to prove we will love and serve the Lord at every hazard, not caring too deeply about what other people think of us.

I always breath a sigh of relief when the decorations come down.  I feel the same way when I return from a trip.  I love normal life.  I love routine and simplicity.  But, this is the time of year for new beginnings.  It is the time to test what we believe to be true by being our best selves, being honest in all of our doings, forgiving and forgetting, and serving those whom the Lord, in his omniscience, placed in our family circles.  It is to consider that His return draweth nigh and it is time to prepare for that event by seeking first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness.  If we do this with singleness of heart, then then all these things shall work together for our good and His name's glory.   This was perhaps, one of the sweetest holidays I have ever experienced.   The best times were definitely those moments when I was just holding a baby, sharing thoughts with loved ones, or hearing about my daughter's mission and what she learned.  As I put the ornaments away, I was genuinely excited for next Christmas and wondered what might transpire between this year and next.  I don't worry about stress tests and my accumulation of points.  It isn't what happens to me that is all important, but how I respond to those stressors that will make all the difference. 
 

Do World Events Make You Anxious?

Can there be peace amidst the storms and challenges of modern mothering? 
 Me with my daughter, Shanelle, who is the mother of five young children.   

LDS members have been told that the Second Coming is near since the incipient beginnings of their church when Joseph Smith, the prophet of the Restoration, explained in the very first chapter of the Doctrine and Covenants:  "Prepare ye, prepare ye for that which is to come, for the Lord is nigh".   This can be considered both good and bad news.  As we are taught, it is a great day for the prepared and a dreadful day for those who are not.  But how imminent is the Second Coming and how important is it for faithful saints to know of its general proximity?  Scriptures in the Old Testament, the New Testament all contain a significant number prophecies whereby informed and believing souls can identify the signs of the times.   These things are reinforced by what we consider to be modern revelation which includes the Book of Mormon, the Doctrine and Covenants and the Pearl of Great Price, as well as inspired utterances by modern apostles and prophets. 

I often think of pregnancy as a type and shadow for the Last Days.  As the pains become more intense, your knowledge that delivery is approaching becomes more sure. Knowing what to expect reduces anxiety and helps you be prepared for the transitioning events.  Every prophet talked about the last days and how intense they would eventually become, "For there shall be great tribulation, such as was not since the beginning of the world to this time, no, nor ever shall be."  Matthew 24:21

But, what we must never forget is the potential of what delivery can yield.  I recall my first pregnancy and how painful it was becoming.  The hardest part was not knowing at what point I was at and if I could endure to the end.  I had falsely assumed that labor began in the delivery room.  I had misunderstood the order of things as presented in my maternity classes.    I wondered if all the pain I had endured to that point was but a precursor to something perhaps unbearable.  I didn't know that my delivery was literally minutes away.  When I began to have contractions in subsequent pregnancies, I would actually get butterflies, the excited, anticipatory kind, because I knew what was possible.  I feel it can also be such when anticipating the winding up scenes and seeing prophecies being fulfilled which indicate that these days are near, even knowing that difficult days lie ahead.  We anticipate that it will culminate with a condition where every knee shall bend and every tongue confess that Jesus is the Christ.  It will be a time, according to Isaiah and the Book of Revelation, when all tears shall cease for the righteous.   "And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain; for former things are passed away."  Yet, it is clear that calamities and the predominance of unrighteousness upon the earth are going to be a part of the refining process:  "What are these which are arrayed in white robes? and whence came they? . . . These are they which came out of great tribulation, and have washed their robes, and made them white in the blood of the Lamb."  (Revelation 7:13-14)  

Not only do we have the words of Isaiah, Paul, John, Peter and others rehearse what the last days would entail, but we have had all the prophets of the Restoration give us insights as to what expect. As a young teenager, I was so impressed with the 24th chapter of Matthew and its rehearsal of conditions in the last days.  Now, more than 4 decades later, almost every one of these predictions have seen at least partial fulfillment.  So do I panic?  Do I worry what the recent Blood Moon may have set in motion?  The answer is no.    Have I made a mad dash to the grocery store?  I have added systematically to my food storage supply.  Is this a time to be wholly at peace and lulled into a type of security.  I don't think that is appropriate for any time in mortality, much less this time.  There is simply no better time than right now to set our homes in order.   Delay just postpones blessings that we could now be enjoying.  It is like trying to immunize yourself after you hear the outbreak is in your city, your neighborhood or in your home.  It is risky and imprudent to delay.  

I have noticed some working more diligently on their food storage of late.   I love how the Lord defines a righteous virgin in D&C 45:57:  "For they that are wise and have received the truth, and have taken the Holy Spirit for their guide, and have not be deceived, verily I say unto you, they shall not be hewn down and cast into the fire, but shall abide the day."  If I had to choose between having an ample supply of food, necessities and sundries or the current capacity to recognize and qualify for the gifts of the spirit, I would definitely choose the latter.  But, the latter can persuade me to follow the words of the prophets and set aside a supply of necessities.    I call this a righteous spiral.  Keeping the commandments increases your sensitivity to the Spirit of revelation.   The Spirit can give us direction and inspiration in the implementation of those commandments. 

I feel the advice as found in D&C 51:17 is perfect.  "And the hour and the day is not given unto them, wherefore let them act upon this land as for years, and this shall turn unto them for their good."  But if we are knowledgeable about the scriptures, praying and counseling as a family, we will be prepared even if the end is soon through a marvelous principle called the Law of Justification.  One of our families favorite scriptures is found in Malachi 3:16:  "Then they that feared the Lord spake often one to another.  And the Lord hearkened, and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before them that feared the Lord, and that thought upon his name.  And they shall be mine, saith the Lord of hosts, in that day when I make up my jewels; and I will spare them as a man spareth his own son that serveth him."

We live in precarious times.  Pride, evil and arrogance abound.  It is just as President Ezra Taft Benson predicted.  He said that society just prior to the second coming of the Savior will be just as it was prior to His visiting the Americas, following His resurrection.  Evil would abound, but there would also be those so spiritually attuned that they will have rent the veil and communed with angels. It would be a time when it would be very unpopular to promote morality.  It would be a time when good would be called evil and evil good.   It would be just as it was in Jerusalem, when Christ declared He was the Bread of Life, when many no more walked with him.  I believe the great and final winnowing has begun in earnest, just as in the meridian of time.  

So how do we know where we stand?  We might ask ourselves, "when was the last time I felt the spirit strongly?"   Feeling the spirit is a good indication that you are on a strait and narrow path.   However, if you feel that you cannot progress because of the actions of others, it is likely that you have need of repentance.  Repentance, as is explained in the Bible Dictionary, is from a Greek word "of which this is the translation denotes a change of mind, a fresh view about God, about oneself, and about the world."  We need to approach God and seek his view of things, including his view of us.  Then, we need to trust him and let him mold us into that person he wants us to become.   Don't feel badly, the more enlightened you are, the more you will take advantage of the healing power of the atonement.   The Bible Dictionary further explains, "Without this there can be no progress in the things of the soul's salvation, for all accountable persons are stained by sin and must be cleansed in order to enter the kingdom of heaven.  Repentance is not optional for salvation; it is a commandment of God."

It does take my breath away to watch the World News.   I daily watch the CNN Student News with my students.  Prophecy is literally unfolding before our eyes.  Just remember that the fruits of righteousness include peace of mind.  Just as when we have a fever, it is an indication we need to check in with the doctor and make adjustments.  When we lack peace and hope, and feel despair, it is time to check in with the Master Physician to see what we need to add or take away from our lives so that spiritual balance can be restored.  If we feel that all is well and Zion, it is likely time to take stalk as well.  

These words may seem too simple, but the Lord has promised to those that are heavily burdened:  

"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart:  and ye wall find rest unto your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. "  Matthew 11:28-30

One quote I love was authored by Bruce R. McConkie, "The very reason for preaching the gospel to the world is so believing souls may escape the sorrows and desolations that lie ahead." (The Millennial Messiah, p. 574.)   Isn't the greatest calamity of all to have procrastinated the day of our repentance until it is everlastingly too late.  "They shall look for me, and, behold, I will come; and they shall see me in the clouds of heaven, clothed with power and great glory; and with all the holy angels; and he that watches not for me shall be cut off."  (D&C 45:44.)  Is it possible to be sealed up against the calamities?  I believe it is.  "Hurt not the earth, neither the sea, nor the trees, till we have sealed the servants of our God in their foreheads." (Revelation 3.)  One of the simplest means of bringing a great spirit into a family is simply to pray together morning and night and to read a few scriptures together at the day's end.  This simple daily act can increase both our desire and our capacity to be good.   We additionally recommend a daily accounting of the ways in which we think we may have seen the hand of the Lord in our lives that day.   For "faith is kindled by hearing the testimony of those who have faith."  (Bible Dictionary, Faith)   For truly by small and simple things will great things come to pass. 

Vicki Robinson

Am I Crazy or are Youth Sports Getting Out of Hand?

Pros and Cons of Club Sports for Children

We are a soccer family and have been involved in competition soccer for thirty-one years!  Eight of our children have played high school soccer.  Our boys also played for the University of Utah, as did my husband.  One son was the president of the U Men’s Soccer when he was there.   He eventually had to give it up to attend law school at BYU.   Both of our boys are now wonderful fathers, both are attorneys, and both of them were coached by Ramon Cuevas when playing competition soccer. As parents, we just might have a record for the number of youth soccer games attended, but that is because we have children which range in age from 15 to 38.  We've been around for enough years to see how things are changing in youth sports.  

 Alyse #31 with her high school team

We just returned from a visit to Connecticut where two teenage grandsons and our twelve year old granddaughter play competition soccer.  What impressed us was that their league provides a written stated policy that they do not discriminate because of religious beliefs.  What that translated into was that you would not be expected to play on a certain day if that interfered with your religious beliefs or practices.  For example, if your Sabbath Day is Saturday, you could fully participate the other six days a week.  They had a tournament scheduled for the weekend we were there and though the coach would have liked our granddaughter, Haley, to play, my daughter and husband reaffirmed that Haley would not participate on Sunday.  She did not have any reprisal for that decision.  Local Utah teams, to my knowledge, do not have this same stated policy.  Our club, in contrast, states the following for their Premier Teams:  "XXXX Soccer is the top priority, over all other sports and activities.  Attendance is required at all training sessions, games and tournaments.  Playing time is not guaranteed.  Teams may be scheduled to play on Sunday for specific soccer events."   Unfortunately, I found the paper and read it after committing and registering.  The guidelines stated there are other levels of play with fewer requirements, but my daughter wanted to play with these friends who challenge her most.  This is a dilemma and I haven't slept well for a couple of nights after learning all that is now required for her current team.     

LDS Doctrine

We have also made a decision not to play on Sundays based on the doctrine of the LDS church with which we affiliate:    “And that thou mayest more fully keep thyself unspotted from the world, thou shalt go the house of prayer and offer up thy sacraments upon my holy day; For verily this is a day appointed unto you to rest from your labors, and to pay thy devotions unto the Most High; Nevertheless thy vows shall be offered up in righteousness on all days and at all times; But remember that on this, the Lord’s day, thou shalt offer thine oblations and thy sacraments unto the Most High, confessing thy sins unto thy brethren, and before the Lord.  And on this day thou shalt do none other thing, only let thy food be prepared with singleness of heart that thy fasting may be perfect, or, in other words, that thy joy may be full.”  (Doctrine and Covenants 59:9-13)   Most children who attend soccer tournaments belong to religious groups that believe in the teaching is found in the bible.   Moses received the Ten Commandments and sabbath day observance is among them.   Sabbath day observance, according to many theologians, is a sign between men and God, that they remember God.  Leviticus 26 delineates the consequences of a nation who forgets God and ceases to keep that day holy.  It is not a pretty prophecy.   I recall the words of a former LDS church president,  Ezra Taft Benson, in which he taught that Israel experienced all of those dire prophecies and if we, who also live in a promised land, break those same laws as a nation, we can expect the same dire consequences.   Isaiah 58 shares incredible blessings that follow when individuals keep the Sabbath Day holy.  So how did we come to be a nation and a state where not observing the Sabbath is the norm rather than the exception? 
 

           

These are five of six girls who played high school soccer and club soccer.
Photo is minus Shanelle who only played high school one year
and then became a varsity cheerleader.

Son, Richard, and husband, Bryan, with two of many grandchildren who currently play soccer.

Things have changed a great deal over the last few years relating to competition soccer and we know these trends are becoming quite pervasive among most clubs who play at this level.  I am guessing the premise behind this new level of intensity is to afford our players exposure to prospective coaches that can recruit them for college play and the skills to impress them.   Being involved in numerous tournaments is now a requirement.   It used to be that our coaches were fathers who donated their time.  Now, we have professional coaching and that is expensive.  Additionally, it is becoming more and more common for those who sponsor these tournaments to dictate which hotels the teams stay at.  We learned recently that coaches are sometimes mandating the girls travel to and from these tournaments as a group, and sleep with teammates, which increases the cost to parents if they wish to attend.   As money was tight for our family through the years, soccer tournaments became our vacations.  This current level of expense, the current trends that focus on expensive tournaments that include mandatory Sunday play, and mandatory accommodations at those tournaments, has taken soccer to a level that makes me feel uncomfortable.   I fear we are no longer the kind of family coaches want participating on their teams. Why did we fit for almost 30 years and not now?

Positive Benefits of Club Participation through the Years

We can honestly say that our children’s participation in club soccer has been a very positive thing in their lives. All of our children were on the premier teams. For years and years those teams and coaches chose not to play on Sundays as per the vote of the families.  We were able to choose our own accommodations or stay with the group at those tournaments.  We didn’t have large expenses for indoor facilities and we actually got to focus entirely on High School play and associated costs in the summer/fall for the girls and in the spring for the boys.

 Our children have made amazing friends and learned commitment and discipline

 as a result of club and high school soccer

 Daughter Audrie, front, with teammates

Our children learned commitment, self-discipline and enjoyed the companionship of great young men and women, and had exemplary coaches, some of who refused to be paid to make competition affordable.  They were all very good soccer players and were still able to maintain high academic marks.  They all went all to college with academic scholarships. 

Current Goals of League Soccer vs. Robinson Goals for Club Soccer

Has club soccer changed from being a family oriented organization to one that subscribes to a business model where success is determined by two standards:  Winning and earning a college scholarship.  These have not been, nor ever will be, our primary reasons for wanting our children to play competition soccer, as fitness, joy in playing the sport, academic success and family values trump these goals.  But these sets of goals do not need to be mutually exclusive.  With small changes, it would still be possible to have an excellent soccer experience, be ready to play high school and college ball, as well as be strong academically and morally.  There is so much more to gain from this sport beyond simply being recruited.  We have the perspective of years beyond soccer play for the majority of our children. 

Grandson Cameron

What does the future hold for my grandchildren as they begin participation in organized sports?

Future Trends of Organized Youth Sports

We are afraid that soon only the affluent and those willing to play on Sunday, with an exclusive goal of college play at all costs, will be involved in competition soccer.  Do soccer leagues really want to discourage individuals from upholding their values and spending time as families during tournaments, or put them in uncomfortable monetary straits?  Is it fair to penalize them for wanting to be true to their values?  We are concerned she will have prejudiced treatment because of our commitment to Sabbath Day observance and our openly communicated concerns.  Are coaches given too much latitude, while discouraging parental input?   We just have a different perspective because we see beyond the immediate to adult life, after high school and college, which comes so quickly. 

As I pondered why I have felt so uncomfortable and stressed the last few days, I had to consider what has been the cause of my greatest stresses throughout the years?  Usually one of three things is the answer:  One, is that I don't understand things correctly.  When I believe something that isn't true or accurate, stress is the result.  Another reason is that I might need to do or say something.  Both of these require some form of repentance.  It has been my experience that my goal can't be to change others or their perception of things.  But, I often feel impressed to share my best thoughts and give others the opportunity to consider them.    I tend to get really sad when I think my happiness is contingent on others changing or when I feel at the mercy of some situation.  The gospel is one of hope, not hopelessness.   Once, I figure out what I need to do or say, usually my peace is restored, regardless of what others do.  So I prayed, did more research, read the teachings of our church's leaders, and read more scriptures.   It wasn't until I read a comment made in response to an article addressing Sabbath play in the NFL, that I found my answer:  A father wrote of the same concerns I stated above.  He began by saying that these issues are quite complicated and these issues relate to how we raise our children.   Then he asked, why is Sunday play such a big issue here in Utah and in surrounding states?  He believed that if you were to poll participating families who play in tournaments on Sunday, most of them would say that they would rather not play on Sunday given their Christian values.  He said the answer is that we are in this situation as parents because we want it both ways.  We want to please God, but we also want the most highly competitive experience possible for our kids.  We feel our children won't progress to their athletic potential as soccer players or have the same opportunities, if we aren't on that Premier team.  He said that those few team members who refuse to play on Sunday, knowing that their league supports Sunday play, are actually fostering Sabbath play as much as every other member of the team.  They still pay for tournament fees which reinforce Sunday play.  They pay fees to their club which encourages or mandates Sunday play.  Finally, they create a situation where some other child breaks the Sabbath Day to replace them in a tournament.  He said the only remedy would be for teams to put pressure on tournament organizers to not play on Sundays by not participating in those tournaments and stating their preferences and that is not likely to happen for the above reasons. 

These comments really opened my eyes and isolated why I was uncomfortable.  If our team's parents were to vote as to whether to participate in these specific tournaments or not, I believe the majority would vote to participate because exposure to college recruiters is deemed essential.   (The decision of which tournaments to play and even how to travel to the tournaments had been made by our coach, that was approved by our league, so they, initially, were the ones I blamed for my discomfort).   If this is the standard and requirement of our competition soccer league for premier play, then we, as a family, shouldn't have committed to be a part of it.  WE need to be willing to give up all the advantages of league play, if Sabbath Day observance means that much to us.  Our league didn't put us in this uncomfortable position, we did.  We wanted to be part of this team and still be wholly faithful to the values we ascribe to and we can't do both under the current league guidelines. 

Throughout religious history, believing individuals must choose between pleasing the world and worldly success and pleasing God.  That always involves some form of sacrifice, but as I said in a previous blog:  Sacrifice is giving up something good for something better.  But that "better" may not be realized or observed until some time in the future.  We are going to remove ourselves from the team, because we don't intend to comply with their requirement of Sunday play, nor can we in good conscience support that being a requirement of participation by our league. That will mean that Alyse will likely lose contact with some of her cherished friends on that team.  We will still be required to pay the fees for club membership as per the contract we signed.  She may not make the athletic advances that she would have had remained with this team.  She will likely not be invited to play on a college team at the end of high school.  But, we will be at peace regarding this issue.  However, there are countless more things for us to repent of, other ways we need to overcome our hypocrisy, and that is the beauty and overriding task of being mortal. 

I fell in love with this soccer player and married him. 

Interesting  Related Articles in the Deseret News: 
 1.   http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865631509/Were-doing-youth-soccer-wrong-The-culture-of-winning-hurts-player-development.html?pg=2   

 2.  http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865631021/Youth-soccer-guest-commentary-2-Were-doing-it-wrong-Players-arent-born-with-talent.html?pg=3 

 3.  http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865631607/Amy-Donaldson-Former-BYU-QB-Jake-Heaps-rise-fall-a-cautionary-tale.html?pg=2

Sacrifice: Giving up Something for Something Better

One of the things that make Mormon couples unique is that they have the privilege of sending children, who are willing and desirous, away from home to serve an ecclesiastical mission.   Young Men serve for 2 years and Young Women, 18 months.   Our daughter Audrie is serving in the Rosario Argentina Mission.  She had just completed two semesters of college before she left.  To that point she hadn’t even lived away from home.   Parents, and often the children themselves, have tried to save money for this event.  It is to take individuals in the last years of their adolescence and early twenties, when self-absorption could be at its peak, and give them an opportunity to learn to serve others and teach them what they believe to be true.    How do we muster the courage and faith to send them?  Where do they get their courage to go?  We can write them weekly, but we only get to hear their voices twice a year, on Christmas and Mother’s Day. 

 

Corinne came home after completing her mission, then we learned

 Audrie wanted to serve a mission as well.

Not too long after graduation from high school, young men and women consider serving a mission.

There are fun times with fellow missionaries!

Richard returning and being greeted by grandparents.

Determined sister missionaries are willing to overcome shyness.

This brings me to what I think is the meaning of the word sacrifice.  I love my husband’s definition:  “It is to give up something for something better.”  Not always is a mission experience perfect.  All missions are difficult at best.  Some feel pressure to go before they were ready.  Others go for the wrong reasons.  But I have never seen a course of activity that has yielded such incredibly positive fruits.  It may seem to some an incredible sacrifice to postpone education, remain morally clean and avoid the use of drugs and alcohol during what many assume should be a more carefree time in their lives.   But those who think in those terms would be surprised to learn how satisfying personal growth and overcoming the “natural man” really is and how serving a mission can better prepare them for their college experience, marriage and family. 

 

Missionaries find this a unique time when they don’t have to worry about monetary pursuits, school, a spouse or children.  It is a time to immerse themselves in the teachings of Christ and invite others to consider their value.  It is an opportunity to change lives, mostly their own.  It isn't only the children who face a mission with courage, amid some fears, there are parents who are mustering faith in their testimonies that this an expedient and ordained calling.    As Christians, we often think of the great sacrifice of our Savior, how he suffered and died for us, that we might have an abundant life both now and in eternity.  We often forget, however, the offering of the Father in those divine events that comprise the atonement.  It was a supreme gift from our Heavenly Father.   As we send these children off into the world, we get insights into the love of that Father for his children.   It is a wonderful opportunity for a family to unite in an offering that is simply giving up something for something better.   

LDS position on gay, religious rights may influence state legislatures around the U.S. | Deseret News

LDS position on gay, religious rights may influence state legislatures around the U.S. | Deseret News

Many may consider that this approach is something new.  It is wholly consistent with LDS Doctrine and the Articles of Faith that they embrace.  The problem is that LDS detractors will never be content until the LDS deny their belief in the Bible and its doctrine that legal marriage between a man and woman is the only circumstance where sexual relations should occur.  The premise of the LDS and the Bible is that the purpose of life is to subdue all inclinations to do otherwise, through the power of Christ.   

One can extend to others the freedom to worship as they please and treat them with civility and avoid discriminatory practices.  But liberals both within and outside of the Church of Jesus Christ feel it is bigotry to promote moral values.  Just a few weeks ago I learned that judges in California, and in some other states, cannot belong to the Boy Scouts of America and continue to serve in their positions.    To promote sexual purity is not bigotry, it is a right guaranteed by the framers of the Constitution.    Neither is it bigotry to affiliate with others of like faith.  Christians are commanded to promote Christian values or they are told they deny their faith.   Those who promote that Christ was tolerant of or indifferent to moral sin haven’t really read the New Testament.     However, he embraced all repentant sinners.   I loved the story of the woman at the well as an example in John 4.  Christ clearly demonstrates that this woman had a chance for exaltation if she would repent, though she had had five husbands and was currently living with a man without the benefit of marriage.  She repented and was instrumental in converting almost an entire community.     The question for all to address is whether or not one believes the Bible to be the word of God.  A good place to begin to address that question is to read the scriptures that pertain to sexual purity in both the Old and New Testaments.   Then prayerful ask God, what is true.   

 

Marriage is ordained between a man and a woman.

Sexual relations are to take place between a man and woman who are married.

Daughter Shanelle, with husband Craig.

Children are to be born into families where there is a married man and woman.

Daughter Kristin with husband Joseph and son, Clark.

I would venture to guess that many who bash gays include several who engage in premarital sex, are unfaithful to their spouses, prematurely get divorced and engage in a multitude of things that are not holy within and without the walls of their own homes and enjoy a wide variety of addictive behaviors themselves, making Christ's teaching to "cast the first stone" appropriately and currently applicable.   But, I am somewhat concerned by a question asked by Mormon parents of LGBT children, "Do you really want our LGBT children to live celibate lives?"   Well, the answer I would give is, "Yes".    The Bible reinforces that having strong sexual urges doesn’t make it right to engage in any immoral acts.  Saying that Christ cannot heal us and change our natures is to deny the atonement.   We expect widowed, single and divorced individuals to be celibate as well.

Personally, I am simply grateful for one more day to seek repentance and overcome my own natural and imperfect tendencies." 

Why Christians Can't be Silent

 

"Those who have used human reasoning to supersede divine influence in their lives have diminished themselves and cheapened civilization in the process."  Elder Dallin H. Oaks

The desire to share why Christians can't be silent was one reason I established this blog.  I feel the secret to happiness and strong families lies in a never ending pursuit of truth and then seeking to apply those truths in everyday living. 

Son Richard and Family

Daughter Shanelle and Family

Son Brett and Family

I am a Christian.  I want to represent my Savior well and follow his example.  As I have prayed to know how to better do that, I feel the Lord has blessed me with some adversity and trials.  These trials have taught me what I don’t think I could have seen clearly without them.  I am a Christian and a sinner.  I don’t think I have met anyone who needs the atonement more than I do.  The cumulative effect of my self-will, pride and missteps are sufficient to prevent me from achieving eternal life, unless I consistently employ the repentance process and seek to improve every day from this hour forward by adding to my knowledge of gospel principles and laying my doings at Christ’s  feet.  I need to not only follow the Savior by being kind and loving, but I need to emulate the way in which he got his errand.  The Savior’s errand was to do and promote the work of the Father.

Where do I start?  One way is to seek to know truth, to really seek to understand God’s character and attributes and my true relationship to him, as well as the purposes of life.    It is, with the help of heaven, an attempt to see myself as I really am.   When I see myself as more than I am or less than I am, I am terribly handicapped in doing good for others.   I have sought to know these things through the instrument of prayer and study.  I have read the Bible and the Book of Mormon and I believe these books to be the word of God.  When I have tried to implement the teachings and principles contained in the scriptures, I have felt a sense of spiritual progress and a growing knowledge that these principles are true.  I believe that God is both omniscient and omnipotent.  I have sought to find a church which has the authority to baptize and bestow the potential of the perpetual companionship of the Holy Ghost. 

God has knowledge of all things past, present and future and based on that omniscience, he has foreordained individuals to accomplish things in this life that are particular to them.  Neal Maxwell, an LDS theologian and apostle now deceased, authored the following:  “It does no violence to our frail human logic to observe that there cannot be a grand plan of salvation for all mankind, unless there is also a plan for each individual.” (A More Determined Discipleship, February Ensign, 1979)

I believe we had a pre-mortal existence and that there was a war fought in heaven that included the spirits of all those who would be assigned to this earth.  We were given volition to choose Satan’s plan or God’s plan.  The war was fought over agency.  Though God is omniscient, his omniscience did not and has not violated the agency of man in the least degree.   I believe that this earth life is a test, actually part two of a two part test.  The first test was to choose either the Father’s plan or Satan’s plan.  Those who chose the Father’s plan now get to enjoy mortality.   Now, we get to live by faith, having forgotten all we learned there, but when truth is presented to us, we have the capacity to remember it, if we are honest truth seekers.  We are currently being tested to see if we will keep the commandments of God and prepare for eternity.  At the conclusion of this life we will be judged by him who is completely fair and receive a designation and ultimate condition of existence based on how we performed.    Faith in true things can only be awakened and obtained by hearing true concepts, by hearing the testimony of those who have faith.  That is why the ancients were commanded to write.  It is why those who profess knowledge of God are commanded to share.  It is the economy of heaven.  Just as evil is hastened by the collective efforts of those who are evil, such as in gang activity, good is promoted by gathering and sharing with others of faith.   We will be judged greatly as Christ declared, in relation to how we interfaced with others, how we treated them, how we judged them, and how we ministered to them.  Many will come to that judgment believing they served well, only to be told they never knew Him, nor applied His doctrine.   

Because I am a Christian and I believe the Bible to be the word of God, I have come to define certain behaviors as sins.  They are those things which offend God and make us unclean.  There are certain behaviors that please God and when those behaviors, beliefs and attitudes are not present, they constitute sins of omission.  Anyone who has, through revelatory experience, determined that there is a God and that Jesus Christ is our Divine Redeemer, has been commanded to promote such.  For example, if you had knowledge of a calamity that was about to threaten your neighborhood, you would be remiss for not acting on that knowledge or sharing that knowledge with your neighbor.  Thus if someone believes in the Bible and believes that sexual impurity,  in any of its forms, would impact one’s condition in the world to come as well as happiness, peace and safety in this life,  and that person doesn’t promote that belief, God would hold him accountable.   Sharing these things is based on a basic premise, as promoted by Paul in the New Testament,  that God is a “rewarder” of those who keep his commandments, (Hebrews 11:6).  In other words, good things will follow living a life of righteousness.  Paul was also astute in the following observation recorded in Hebrews 1:9:  “Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated iniquity; therefore God, even thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows.”    The goal here is not, as many suppose, to make everyone feel comfortable with their current condition of righteousness and avoid making any waves.   My take on the definition of righteous is very simple.  It is anyone who is involved in a consistent process of repentance.   The opposite is also true, someone who is not consistently involved in the repentance process is unrighteous.  

Some maintain that it isn’t Christian to define certain behaviors as sinful.    They argue, “It makes people feel uncomfortable and wasn’t he the Prince of Peace?” Christ didn’t mince words and he wasn’t afraid to offend others when it came to doctrine or need for change.   He did ask others not to throw stones, figuratively or literally, for none are without sin.  This didn’t mean they weren’t to promote what was good and identify what was sin according to His doctrine.  For a Christian to say there is no sin is to deny there is a God, to deny their faith and be counted as in infidel.   Both Ezekiel 3 and Ezekiel 33 both describe a variety of scenarios concerning those who are willing to raise a warning voice and those who are not.  Christ and Moses were two who were described as having attributes of meekness, (Numbers, 12:3).  Yet, these two were extremely bold and willing to offend.  Inherent in biblical definitions of meekness, one must include obedience to God and faithfulness to his words.   Prophets were frequently stoned for preaching.  Almost all of the original apostles were murdered for promoting their beliefs.  Can we hope to enjoy the same glory as the ancients who were willing to give their very lives if we are unwilling to promote the things that they did.

Isaiah taught that there would be those who would call good evil and evil, good, (Isaiah 5:20).   I believe the “way of truth” is to seek knowledge through the vehicle of personal revelation.   Paul explained that the things of the spirit can only be spiritually discerned and to all others, it will sound as foolish traditions.   But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned, (1 Corinthians 2:14)”.  As Americans, we have come a long way in overcoming prejudice, but does that include and presuppose that we should promote evil as acceptable, inconsequential behavior?

I believe that Satan’s greatest tactics involve adding to or taking away from truth.  The adversary is incredibly subtle.   The Prophet Daniel speaks of the abomination of desolation and that abomination which maketh desolate where it ought not to be as signaling the proximity of the last days and great calamity, (See Daniel, chapters 11 and 12).  Could that possibly be a description of a formerly god-fearing nation that  kills its unborn when it is inconvenient to bear and makes it illegal to promote moral values?  

The word of God, as recorded in Leviticus 26, rehearses the consequences of a godless nation.  It is not a pretty prophecy.  I believe we live in a promised land and God makes clear that those who forget Him cannot continue to live in a promised land in peace and safety.  Paul spoke of that which is essential to the role of a woman, who “shall be saved in child bearing, (1 Timothy 2:15).” and God, according to Genesis, commanded Adam and Eve to “multiply and replenish the earth,” (Genesis 1:28).  If the bearing and rearing of children is perhaps the most important work or achievement of human beings, as established in the beginning by our first parents, then homosexuality and abortion would not be activities leading toward that end.   It is understandable that the more crucial the principle, the greater Satan’s campaign against it. 

Horrific things have been done to those believed to be homosexuals.  Horrific things have been done to individuals because of their beliefs and practices.  Horrific things have been done to individuals because of their gender.  But for an individual to say that a practice is not in keeping with the word of God and that word of God is contained in what they consider a holy book is not an act of bigotry or prejudice.  It is simply a declaration of their faith.  Efforts to force all members of society to speak, act, and promote as though there is nothing inherently wrong with any form of sexual impurity is in itself an act of bigotry.   It is also bigotry to force others to behave morally.   It is also a sin to reinforce negative patterns of behavior.  Webster defines a bigot as “one who is intolerant of others.”

Several things are certain:  Either there is a God or there isn’t.  Either the scriptures contained in the Bible are true or they are not, even given errors in translation.  If they are true, then God has established a way for individuals to come to the knowledge of their truthfulness.   Matthew 11:28-30 invites, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly of heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.”   I simply encourage you to seek Him.  I am currently reading the Bible again from cover to cover.  The important thing is not where we have been, but where we are going.   Isaiah’s words bring great comfort for the repentant sinner, (Isaiah 1:18).  Those who do not think the Bible establishes clear guidelines about morality have not read the scriptures or simply choose not to believe them.   You simply cannot read the words of Isaiah, Jeremiah, Paul and a host of others and not conclude they didn’t see our day with exactness. 

I am not here to get you to accept my interpretations of the Bible, nor dictate what you should do when and if you determine that the Bible contains the word of God.    I want you to read the scriptures and then prayerfully decide what your course of action is to be.   But, what is of great concern to me is that increasing numbers who believe in the Bible have rendered themselves silent and encourage all others to be silent in the name of righteousness.  Were that righteous protocol, there would be no holy scriptures, there would be no standard by which to judge our doctrine, there would be no promotion of that which is good and no means by which to improve our condition here or rid our garments of the blood and sins of this generation.   We daily watch shows in our living rooms that promote immorality as acceptable and normal, with little if any negative consequence.  Then, we wonder why our children enjoy premarital sex.
  

With all of my heart, I feel the words of Christ are worthy of careful and prayerful consideration and that there is no better time than the present to do so.  As in the beginning, we are again in a war for the salvation of souls.  We cannot force others to be righteous, but we can put on the whole armour of God.